NaPoWriMo Day 4

I have days where someone says a phrase at me and I just think that should be a poem and this is one of those phrases

You’ve gone now, it’s over and that’s the end of that
Goodbye to the days of hiding the fact
I thought you were a bit of a prat
You were a pain in the arse, and I miss you
like I’d miss a hole in my head
and now that chapter if my life is finished
I am planning to instead
embark on a threesome
with my two favourite men
One of them named jerry
and the other one called Ben

NaPoWriMo Day 3

The poem for day 3 is an old edited one – part of it is in the chortle video thats a few posts down but this is the final edited version of it (for now at least!) It’s a poem for people that find the word ‘love’ (traditionally a poets stomping ground) a bit too scary

Like poem

I have a confession
I wish it wasn’t true
I’m never ever going to say
I love you
Whenever I attempt it
it just sits there in my throat
I try to force it out
but the word makes me choke
I try to make the declaration
as I sit opposite my lover
but none of the right sounds come out
I just sit convulse and splutter
all those awkward moments later
I’ll be the first one to admit
the fact I have trouble with this word
makes it tricky to commit
so many failed attempts later
I have reached the conclusion
that I and all commitaphobes
need a real solution
So if like me you struggle too
hell I feel you brother
I am taking the L word
and replacing it with another

And so when the time arrives
here’s just what to do
take their hand in yours and say
Hey, I Like you

I know just what you’re thinking
that just isn’t enough
but when I say I like you
I mean so much extra stuff
like I like you like a lot
like bob marley likes pot
like a fishes like h2o
like sunflowers like to grow
like puppies like chewing toys
like the clergymen likes little boys
like Bruce Wayne like wearing tights
like nocturnal creatures like the night
like Charles dickens likes writing books
like Gordon Ramsay likes to cook
like George formby likes his banjo
like Broomhilda likes Django
like Sir Mix-a-Lot likes big butts
like the government likes making cuts
like Buzz Light-years best friend was Woody
like police like blaming ‘hoodies’
like burlesque dancers like to tease
like Rastamouse just likes cheese
like Scooby-doo villains like disguise
like Morcombe needed Ernie Wise

And some days I like you so much I worry that I might eat you
and there are days you piss me off
and it makes me want to leave you
but that’s the thing with like you see
like is not just blind
and like is to me a much, much harder thing to find
I like you conditionally
on the days you’re not being a twat
and I always try to do the same
and I hope you like me back

NaPoWriMo – Day 2

Today’s poem is late, because I’ve been waiting in the hope that my nephew would be born in time for my poem to make sense. His mum is in labour and even though it looks like he isn’t going to make his grand entrance today this poem is for him. It’s an edited version of one that was published in a literary diary shortly after we found out he was expected and I look very forward to meeting him.

For Dylan

When you are born
I’ll hold you tight
and knit you blankets made of
magic, dreams and imagination
that will keep you safe

and watch you grow and
it become a magical cape
for you
to climb trees to other lands
talk to dragons and goblins
and build fairytale worlds
out of pop bottles,
play dough
and boxes

until you grow up
and discover life
and the real world
it sits folded in a cupboard
you don’t need it
to keep you safe

but sometimes grown up you will
and see the wisps of magic
that got caught
left tucked under cushions
and remember.


A Very Special Start to NaPoWriMo

This is a particularly special poem for me, in December I met Katie Dodd and her family at a fundraising event and they were in the process of trying to raise money so that they could take Katie to the USA for treatment to help her recover from Ewing’s Sarcoma a condition which had made her very poorly and caused her to lose feeling in her legs. She is now in America and hopefully on her way to a good recovery and the poem I was asked to write was as a thank you to everyone who has helped the family over the past few months. I felt incredibly honoured to be asked to write it and did so very much with a disney princess loving Katie in mind.

Here is a link to the website for anyone wishing to read more and get involved with the cause.


It sounds a lot like an attempt at being a ninja but it actually stands for National Poetry Writing Month. The aim is to write a poem every day for the whole of April so 30 poems in a month (I’ve tried it before and it’s a huge challenge) anyway I’m trying again. I’m going to write something everyday for the next 4 weeks or at least I’ll try, if there are days I don’t succeed my plan is to cheat and upload a video of one of my more recent poems that isn’t already on my blog (its cheating but only a bit and I’m going to play the excuse of finals)

Wish me luck (I’m definitely going to need it!)

Anna x

Gangster Rap and Musicals

Von Rapps

After watching the sound of music
filled with charm and singing nuns
It’s a painful step to admit to yourself
Your dream may well be done
cos your dream is to be a von Trapp Child
At the age of Twenty One

And though at first I will admit
This left me feeling blue
Some things you don’t give up on
You can make your dreams come true
And after hours and hours of thinking
I knew just what I had to do

If I had seven children
I’d have my own set of Von Trapps!
But they wouldn’t just sing Edelweiss
How last century is that?!
I mean, my kids would be edgy
They wouldn’t sing, they’d rap

From birth they would be wearing
Diamond encrusted baby grows
And as soon as they could walk and talk
Perform in talent shows
And I would watch them proud to see
Their fan base grow and grow

As far writing lyrics goes
Again it’s sorted out
I’d play heavy metal at nap time
They won’t sleep cos it’s too loud
Filling them with enough rage and hate
To have things to write about

But as my little army of rappers
Achieve worldwide success
Their tiny faces on front pages
Of the international press
I’d realise they’d had no childhood
Something I would regret

I don’t want them mobbed by screaming fans
As they trundle off to school
And a Jackson 5-esque childhood
Could just be seen as cruel
For them to just be happy
Is actually pretty cool

So at night time I won’t blast music
I’ll just tuck them up in bed
Glad my internationally acclaimed rappers
Were just inside my head
give up on my lifelong dream
and watch the DVD instead